a healthy relationship

How To End A Relationship – Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

Does this look like your to do list:

-Feed the dog -Do Laundry -Break up with significant other

It may not be at the top of your list, but the truth is that when a relationship has gone down hill, somebody has to end it. There are too many relationships that long after the “expire by” date. This happens because breaking up is hard to do.

Sometimes relationships end in a fury, with clothes and personal belongings being thrown off the second story balcony.

Sometimes the relationship just falls flat until somebody has the guts to say “it’s over.”

If you are the person that’s ready to end the relationship, how can you do it without either of you ending up hurt?

First, you have to be completely clear as to why you’re ready to terminate it. Your first thought, may not be the real reason. Once you’ve pinned down your real reason, you have to take the next step and be completely honest, which means a conversation with your partner where you are completely honest and open.

Set a time for the break up that is good for both of you to meet in person. Breaking up over the phone or internet isn’t generally a good idea unless distance is an issue. If it is, do it as soon as possible. Don’t wait until you are in person, just call them and set up a time to talk.

Stay compassionate during the conversation. If you don’t end the romantic ties with compassion, it will be very hard to stay friends, or even be friendly to each other.

Putting your partner on the defensive is the last thing you want to do. Stay present during the conversation. Talk about things you enjoyed about being with them, lessons you’ve learned and the memories you’ll always remember fondly.

There is a good chance that your partner will say things they don’t really mean during the break up. Don’t take these too personally, instead let them go and realize they are just reacting.

It may take more than one conversation or meeting for your partner to comfortably accept the break up. They may also be the type that needs space. Give them what they need to get through the transition.

Don’t let them make you feel guilty though. You’re starting a new part of your life, and a relationship with your ex isn’t included in that. If you’re breaking up for the right reasons, it’s better for both of you to remain just friends.

Should you ever consider reconnecting with your ex? Is the end, “THE END?”

This is so very personal, and in the end, you have to decide it for yourself. Almost all relationships can be saved if the right conditions are met. It just takes time and effort. If you are willing to put forth the effort, then you can come through this upheaval and become an even stronger couple.

That being said, if you are bound and determined to move on, it’s best to end the relationship with a clean break and move along.

Want to find out more about How To End Your Relationship, then visit Paul ‘PJ’ Jackson’s site and discover if you can Save Your Relationship or if it is doomed.